The day I learned that sex can ruin your life.

I learned some pretty strange things in my middle school sex education class. However, I’d consider myself lucky! My class was the only one to have a speaker come in to talk to us. He taught about one thing, and one thing only:

Abstinence.

The only thing I remember from that day was a little activity he had us do. He began by taking a piece of tape about a foot long, then proceeded to stick it to various things. He put it in a someone’s hair, on tables, and on different people’s sweaters. Naturally, I was wearing a sweater that day. He said “Do you see that the tape gets less sticky the more I put it on people? Use that as a representation for yourselves.” He was trying to tell a ton of thirteen and fourteen year old kids that the more people you’re with, the less you are worth. Quite an amazing message to send to a ton of middle schoolers, don’t you think?

Now since I was wearing a sweatshirt, I was one of the fortunate people to be entered in what I like to call the “Pregnancy Lottery.” He had us fight to the imaginary death (or should I say birth) in an epic rock-paper-scissors tournament. Each round, everyone who won got to sit down, while the losers stood at the front of the classroom. Everyone that lost was told, “You have *insert various STD’s*.”

Luckily, I got to sit down after the second round, but the remaining two boys weren’t so lucky. They were told the most horrifying thing a teenage boy can hear:

“You’re pregnant.”

TWO TEENAGE BOYS WERE TOLD THAT THEY WERE PREGNANT. If the rest of the story didn’t show you the problem with our sex education system, that definitely should. Right now, however, I’m going to show you the problem with our national sex education system, and how it’s raising teen pregnancy rates across the country.

By Pixabay | CCo

Here’s where the problem is – literally.

Over 50% of states require that abstinence be stressed in classes, according to the Guttmacher Institute’s article “Sex and HIV Education.” Over half of those states also aren’t required to provide any information on any other form of contraception. Some of these states are Texas – which was third on Live Science’s list of teen pregnancy rates for each state – as well as Louisiana, which came in fifth, and Arkansas, coming in as fourth worst in the country.

I don’t know about you, but I am certainly noticing a trend here.

However, when we take a look at the bottom of Life Science’s list, we notice something that some people just don’t know how to explain. Places like Vermont – coming in forty-ninth with nearly the lowest teen pregnancy rates in the country – is merely required to cover abstinence in class. They are required to teach their students how to avoid coercion, how to make healthy life decisions, and how to use a condom. I know this might sound kinda crazy, but did you know that condoms make you less likely to get pregnant if they’re used properly when you have sex? In fact, if you use them correctly, they’re up to 98% effective, according to Planned Parenthood.

So Vermont is pretty great and all, but do you know what’s really close to Vermont? Canada.

More than just some moose.

At this point, it’s not too crazy for anyone to hear this: Canada is so much better than the United States in many more ways than one. They have Tim Horton’s, moose, poutine, and a solid functioning sex education curriculum. The over 100% difference between each country’s teen pregnancy rates proves the definite differences, according to the Advocates for Youth article “The Truth About Abstinence-Only Programs.” Leslie Young with Global News explains how sex ed is taught in America like this: “Ontario’s newly-revised sexual education curriculum introduces kids to the proper names for genitalia by Grade 1, the physical changes of puberty in Grade 4, and how to prevent sexually-transmitted infections in Grade 7,” and says that other provinces are practically the same. She also goes on to talk about the ages that students are typically informed about other topics, such as sexual orientation, gender identity, and contraception.

Remember earlier when we noticed the trend between information about contraception and lower pregnancy rates? I know I remember that.

Blame it on the biology.

 [perfectpullquote align=”left” bordertop=”false” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]Telling teenagers not to have sex is like telling geese to stay farther north during the winter.[/perfectpullquote]

Believe it or not, teenagers have a lot of hormones. In the video “Let’s Talk About Sex: Crash Course Psychology #27,” Hank Green briefly explains the new hormones introduced into teenagers bodies during puberty. They basically make teenagers want to have sex more.  Telling teenagers not to have sex is like telling geese to stay farther north during the winter.It’s all in the biology.

Now being a teenage girl myself, I know some things about how teenagers think, and have some input on this situation (I know, it’s crazy, a teenage girl having an idea is a terrifying concept). 

Safety first.

By Pixabay | CC0

Believe me, I, along with all of my peers, know that abstinence is the most fool proof form of contraception. It makes it literally impossible to contract an STD or get pregnant. However, I, along with all of my peers, also know that it is the least realistic in today’s society.

[perfectpullquote align=”right” bordertop=”false” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]We should be taught how to be responsible for our bodies in the exact same way we are taught to be responsible with our driving.[/perfectpullquote]

Think of it this way; in drivers education classes, we are taught how to drive safely, rather than be told to just not drive at all. We are shown people getting thrown out of their cars, the multiple car crashes on freeways, and the other possible dangers of driving. However, we are also taught the importance of wearing a seatbelt, and how it can save our lives. They tell us to wear a seatbelt because they want us to be safe and responsible. They tell us to wear a seatbelt so we don’t get thrown out of our car windows as well.

We should be taught how to be responsible for our bodies in the exact same way we are taught to be responsible with our driving.

I’m not saying to withhold information about STD’s, and the struggles of teen pregnancy, or how hard it is to be a mother or father at the ripe ages of 15-19. They need to know about the possible negative outcomes of sex as well. What we need to start doing is educating teenagers about contraception, and more than just abstinence. This way, they will want to protect themselves from the dangers that unprotected sex can cause, and on top of that, they’ll actually know how to. It’s unrealistic to tell kids not to have sex. I mean, how many times have you told them to clean their room? Chances are, it’s still a mess.

So, would you rather teach your kids how to put on a condom, or how to change a diaper?

Featured Image: Pexels | CC0